Sasha's Demons Read online

  * * *

  I wake up the next morning to more knocking on my door. Arghhh, I seriously need to move and not tell a living soul where I bloody live. I quickly pull on some yoga pants and reluctantly open the door. There’s a delivery guy standing there holding two bunches of flowers, each containing a dozen pink roses.

  “Delivery for Miss Sasha Adams.”

  I take the roses inside and take out the little card attached.

  To a beautiful girl who deserves beautiful roses xx

  I seriously don’t know what game he’s playing, but I know straight away they are from Brax. What the fuck is he playing at? He has a woman and here he is sending me roses.

  I’ve decided that today I’m doing absolutely nothing, but curling up on my couch and reading a good book, preferably one that isn’t about love. That is, just not my cup of tea, at the moment. I must’ve dosed off because I’m waking to yet another knock on my door. I reluctantly pull myself off the couch and walk to the door. I open it to Josh’s parents. Every time I lay eyes on his dad, my heart constricts. They have so many alike features that it’s almost uncanny.

  “Sasha, would you mind if we came in?” Sandy asks looking straight at me. I usher them in and they follow me to the living room. Once we’ve taken a seat, we seem to be lost in our own worlds, until John says something I wasn’t expecting.

  “Josh’s lawyer has been in contact and is trying to get hold of you.”

  “Why on earth would he want to contact me?” I ask, because I seriously want to know why.

  “Josh has left you some things in his Will, and his lawyer needs you to sign the forms to finalize everything.”

  I’m dumbfounded. Too shocked to say anything. What on earth did he leave me? I never signed those forms for the house.

  “Ok.... Well, I guess you can give him my number.” They both nod and then ask me how I’ve been lately and though it’s lovely to catch up with them, it’s painful at the same time. Sandy and John ask me out to lunch. I’m getting presentable to go and have lunch with them when I hear yet another knock on the door. Honestly, what the hell is going on?

  I’m up and down like a whore’s drawers, I think to myself.

  I hear John call out that he will get it. I pull on a pair of skinny jeans and a nice fitting shirt and throw my hair up in a messy bun. I walk back into the living room to check who it is and stop dead in my tracks. He’s here again and chatting with Josh’s parents. I’m too shocked to speak until Sandy stands up and walks over to me.

  “Is this the man who sent you those beautiful roses?” she asks. I feel strange because I’m not sure if I should tell her or not. I decide to nod my head without saying a word.

  Sandy speaks softly, “He’s quite lovely, Sasha. You know, you can move on. Don’t let anyone hold you back. Josh wouldn’t want that. He loved you too much to have you unhappy.” She’s definitely encouraging me to move on, but the feelings I have for Josh didn’t just disappear with his death. I follow her into the living room in time to hear John invite Brax out for lunch. I glare at him and give him my biggest death stare possible, without Sandy or John noticing. He just winks at me, the infuriating bastard.

  We all walk to the restaurant, John and Brax walk in front of us and I can hear them talking. Sandy keeps on sending me questioning glances, but I just smile and brush it off. I can tell she wants the gossip with regards to Brax, but I don’t want to discuss it, so I continue to be coy.

  Lunch has turned out to be not so bad. Brax has hardly spoken to me and is talking with John about his business ventures. They ask Brax what he does for a living and he tells them he’s in the music industry. Just as he states it two young girls move nervously toward him and ask for an autograph. He signs one girl's arm and the other hands him a napkin. He turns to see me watching the whole exchange. He smiles that mouth-watering smile at me and then turns his attention back to John and Sandy. My cheeks are flushed and I know Sandy saw the whole exchange because she gives my hand a squeeze under the table.

  “So, Brax do you live here or just passing through?” John questions out of curiosity.

  “No, sir, I don’t, but I’ll be here for quite some time because we’re recording at the moment.” Brax is so polite, I’ve forgotten that’s how he usually acts. Although when he looks at me it makes me feel like he’d want nothing better than to tie me to my bed, pull out a whip and take care of my attitude.

  “Oh, wonderful. Is your girlfriend staying with you?”

  My head whips around to Sandy who’s straight to the point trying to dig up some information.

  “No, actually, I’m not seeing anyone at the moment, but hopefully that will change soon.” Brax is smirking again. Argh, I can’t decide whether to punch him in the face now or later. My internal debate is on.

  “Oh, but Brax, what about the beautiful lady that was on your arm at Gossip? I’m sure she’d willingly take you up on that opportunity,” I say, a little bit too sarcastically and I notice he’s holding back by biting the inside of his lip. However, instead of replying he just smiles.

  “Oh, you know me, Sash. We both know she wasn’t going to make the cut, I have a thing for blondes.”

  “Alright, Sasha, we have to be off. Don’t forget the lawyer will ring you on Monday. Okay, sweetie?” Sandy leans down and kisses me on the cheek and John repeats the same action on the other.

  “It was lovely to meet you, Brax. Hopefully when Sasha comes to visit next she’ll bring you, too.” Sandy is really acting out the matchmaker role.

  “Oh, I would love to. I’m sure Sasha won’t mind either.”

  Okay.... Okay.... Calm down before my fist starts to fly, I think to myself.

  Sasha

  Sandy and John leave and we are left sitting here not saying a word. I know he’s trying to work out what I’m thinking and I’m internally debating how much trouble I can get into by giving him a black eye.

  “Are you going to talk or continue to give me death stares?” Brax asks in a very sweet, gentle voice which makes me even angrier.

  “Who do you think you are? Coming to my home again and then to top it off, accepting a lunch invitation with Josh’s parents?” I’m sneering at him now.

  “I told you, Sasha, we are going to try this friendship route, whether you like it or not.”

  He really thinks that? Well, okay, I can play along. I’ll show him the line between a friendship and a relationship.

  “Fine, but friends don’t just pop over. Use your bloody phone next time.”

  He raises his eyebrows at me, like he’s questioning the fact that he won so easily. “Okay, friend, what are your plans for tonight?”

  “Actually, I’m going back to Gossip to meet one of my friends.”

  “Well, friend, would you mind if I join you?” he asks, with a hopeful inflection in his voice.

  I’m not sure if I should let him. I’m seeing someone who’s been my ‘bed buddy’ for the last two weeks. I met Zack one night and we went back to his house and, well, one thing led to another. I told him I’m not looking for anything serious and he was fine with that. Mainly because he doesn’t have time for a girlfriend, which is great for me because I only need him when I’m horny, and he gets the job done. He isn’t mind blowing, but he gets me to where I need to be with no strings attached.

  “Sure, how about you meet me there at eleven.” I stand to leave, but he grabs ahold of my hand and I turn around.

  “Don’t you want a lift there? I can take you.”

  “No, Brax. I told you, I’m meeting someone. So, I’ll catch you tonight.” I pull my hand away and walk off without turning around, although I can feel his eyes fixated onto my back.

  * * *

  Zach picked me up and took me out for dinner and drinks before we headed out for the night. We’re in his car and I get the opportunity to stare at him. He is really easy on the eyes and has a lovely personality, but I could never open myself up again like I did for Josh. Zach has sandy blond hair and
it’s cut quite short for his work. He owns a construction company and his body is very well defined. He isn’t someone I would usually take notice of, because he has crooked teeth and his nose looks like he’s been punched a few times because it's slightly crooked. Although, he definitely makes up for his appearance or lack thereof with his oozing confidence.

  I’ve lost track of time and tonight, thus far, is turning out to be great. I’m well on my way to being drunk and have been hauling Zach out onto the dance floor with me all night. The poor guy can’t move to save his life, but I just grind up and down on him and all he has to do is hold my hips. Salt N Pepa comes on with ‘Push it’ and I’m basically climbing all over his body, because I’m horny as fuck at the moment and I’m ready to just take him here and now, even if he is a shit dancer. Zach’s mouth slams down on mine and I feel his erection digging into my sensitive spot as I continue to grind up on him until I’m pulled abruptly backwards into a strong torso.

  I’m going to give this person a piece of my mind, because honestly, how fucking rude can you get? I turn around to two very familiar piercing grey eyes which are set on someone behind me. I whip my head around to see that Brax has Zach in his killing radar. I punch him once right into his chest to get this infuriating mans attention. It takes him a few moments before his eyes zero in on me. I take a step back because he seems absolutely furious.

  “What the fuck are you doing?” I basically scream at him.

  “Saving you from doing something embarrassing, obviously,” he sneers at me, continually moving his eyes over me and then glaring back over my shoulder.

  “You have no right, you fucking asshole!” I shove him again to make him acknowledge me, but he doesn’t move. My efforts have no effect on him because he is triple my size.

  “Is this what you do? Basically have sex in public? Is that how you like it? Do you like to be treated like a whore, Sasha?”

  “Fuck you, you piece of shit. I am seeing Zach at the moment. Not that it’s any of your business. So, where is your little friend? Shouldn’t you be paying attention to her and not worried about what I’m doing?”

  “I came here tonight to hang out with you, but obviously you’re busy.” He turns and storms off and it doesn’t bother me one little bit.

  Zach asks, “ What the hell was that all about?”

  I shrug my shoulders in response. We walk to the bar and grab a couple more rounds of drinks and then take a seat. We’re sitting, talking when I notice Zach’s eyes go wide at something behind me. I turn around and find Brax standing there, so I turn back and ignore him as I pick up my drink and take a sip.

  “Can I take a seat with you guys?”

  Zach eyeballs me with speculation and I just shrug my shoulders again, because I’m not in the mood for his headfuck games. Zach agrees and they make their own introductions. I feel their eyes on me and I slam my drink down my throat. Zach offers to go get me a top up and I reply with, “make it a double.” He squeezes out of the booth quickly to go get it and I don’t blame him... its awkward here. Brax just keeps on staring and apart from it being unnerving, it’s really starting to get on my nerves. He just called me a whore and I’m guessing he now wants to talk. Well, tough shit!

  “Are you just going to ignore me?” he asks. I continue to ignore his questions and pull out my phone to keep me occupied until another drink comes my way.

  “Seriously, Sash? Stop acting like a five-year-old!”

  “Well, fuck off! Maybe this five-year-old doesn’t want to play nice,” I say, using an angry tone.

  “Oh, so she talks when you insult her? Nice to know.”

  I’ve had enough of this night. I need to leave. I grab my bag just as Zach gets back with the drinks, and I inform him that I’m going home. Brax has literally killed my mojo and has put me in a bad mood.

  After a taxi ride home in my drunken state, I stagger inside the lobby and head for the lift. After finally deciding what floor I live on, I push the button and I’m up, up and away. I stumble my way to my door and just manage to open the stupid thing.

  There should be an easier way for drunks to get into their own houses whilst intoxicated, I think to myself.

  Once I’m inside I decide I need to get these tight pants off. I’m on struggle street getting my jeans off, then I decide I’m not drunk enough so I grab myself a bottle of tequila and get back to work on these pants. I keep falling over trying to get them off. I finally manage to remove them while lying on the floor, then I’m just about passed out and entering dreamland when there’s a loud knock on my door. I lift my head from the ground, deciding not to answer and pass back out.

  * * *

  I wake to find myself in my bed and completely naked. I’m racking my brain trying to remember how the hell I ended up here. I get out of bed slowly and pad out to get some aspirin. I stop dead in my tracks when I see Brax, cooking on my stove.

  “What the hell are you doing here?”

  He turns around and it suddenly dawns on me that I’m buck ass naked, so I quickly try to cover myself.

  “I heard a loud bang last night when I came to check on why you left.... and... I may have broken your door trying to get in.” He keeps staring at me and it’s making me feel very uncomfortable. He could at least have the decency to look me in the eyes instead of roaming his eyes all over my body. I make a run for my room and throw on a pair of undies and Josh’s baggy shirt, which I usually sleep in. I pad back to the kitchen and glance across at my front door. It’s barely hanging on its hinges and that just completely pisses me off.

  “You better fix that door, I could get kicked out for that. And can you explain to me why I woke up naked, please?” I ask, raising my eyebrows while I wait for an answer.

  “I undressed you. When I came in you were on the floor grasping a bottle of tequila. I sat you up and you threw up all over yourself.”

  Oh. My. God. How embarrassing!

  “Don’t worry, I was a total gentleman and didn’t look. Well, not on purpose anyways.” He smiles up at me.

  “Okay... Well, thanks for last night, but you're more than welcome to go now.” I point toward the door hoping he will take the hint and leave.

  “Doesn’t work like that, Thorn. You’re coming home with me since it’s unsafe for you to stay here at the moment.”

  “Like hell I am,” I tell him in a stern voice and stamping my foot like a five-year-old.

  “Look, Sash, your door is broken. It’s really unsafe for you to be here. I’ve called a contractor, but they can’t get here until tomorrow. So, the way I see it, we’re friends, I have an extra room, which you’ll be using. Now go pack a bag.”

  The nerve of him, trying to boss me around. “I have other places to stay. I don’t need to stay at yours!”

  “Actually, you don’t! Your sister called while you were passed out and said she and the boys were still away and wouldn’t be back until tomorrow. Stop arguing and go get your shit, now,” he says it in such a calm voice that it makes me forget that he’s actually being a prick and treating me like a child.

  I reluctantly agree, because let’s face it, I really don’t have anywhere else to stay. Plus, it’s only one night.

  Sasha

  I pull up at Brax’s condo and it’s absolutely gorgeous. It sits on the river bank and is a beautiful sight. I hop out of my car and grab my overnight bag from the trunk and follow him inside. When I enter his condo I notice how warm and welcoming it is. The color tones are neutral and you can tell it’s lived in because there are shoes at the doorway, shirts hanging over the back of his couch and dishes piled up in the sink.

  “Ignore the mess, the cleaner doesn’t come until Monday,” he says with a wave of his hand, which gestures toward the mess. It really isn’t too bad at all, it just looks well lived in.

  “It’s fine.... Where should I put my bag?” I ask.

  “You can have my room and I’ll sleep on the couch.”

  “I thought you said you had a spare room
?” I ask, wondering why he would say it if he doesn’t.

  “Well, I do, but it’s full of music equipment,” he says, raising his eyebrows, insinuating that I should already know the answer.

  I follow him through to his room and it’s very nicely furnished. His bed is huge, obviously a king size. The bed has black silk fitted sheets, the doona is pulled back and the bed is unmade. I place my bag on the end of the bed and I turn around to see Brax staring at me. I raise my eyebrows at him in question and a slow smile stirs on his face.

  Brax orders Chinese takeaway as neither of us want to cook. After we eat, we take a seat in the living room on separate sofas.

  He then asks me something that I wasn’t expecting. “How are you coping after everything with Josh?” I’m more than shocked that he would start a conversation about Josh. My heart clenches and feels like it’s being squeezed, hard. I take slow breaths to try to control my breathing, but I can still feel real pain.

  “Why would you ask me about that,” I manage to squeak out.

  “Well, I know you didn’t go to the funeral, and obviously by the way you just reacted, you’re not doing so well. Don’t you think you should try to get some closure?” he asks, staring straight into my eyes and I have to turn my gaze the other way, afraid that I might just break down.

  “Sasha, you are never going to move on if you don’t go and say your goodbyes,” he says this with a small voice, and I know full well that’s what everyone expects and wants me to do, because they all keep telling me to. I just don’t think I’m ready yet, or that I ever will be.

  I ignore Brax for most of the night and eventually sneak off to bed.

  I wake abruptly to someone shaking me. I turn over to see Brax in bed with me, rocking me back and forth. “What are you doing?”

  “You were screaming in your sleep. I came in here to check on you and you wouldn’t wake up,” he says, his arms wrapped around my body. I detangle myself and get up to go to the bathroom.